Finding Spot and a Picnic

I have known Aaron's finding location, since the day I read through his original paperwork.  I knew I wanted to see it when we went to Shenzhen.  We asked at the SWI, and they confirmed the spot, and that when Aaron was found, there was no note with him (there sometimes is a note left with abandoned babies in China, sometimes giving a  birthdate).  Our driver and guide were able to locate the place (with a lot of stopping and asking for directions).  Of course we do not know the exact spot, but the general location.  For example, for a child found in a train station, the family may know he was found there, but not the exact bench.  And so, I found myself at the general location Aaron was discovered at.     When I had first read the report of where Aaron was found, it said he was found beside a riverbank.  This seemed quite unusual to me, because I was used to reading so many stories of babies abandoned in China at very busy areas such as bus stations, train stations, shopping areas, or outside a hospital – (all areas where the child would soon be discovered).  As our car approached, I felt some relief – the shopping area, is along a river's edge.  Our guide confirmed it was the Chinese to English translation that caused the confusion for me – the shopping area is along a riverbank, not that HE was found along a riverbank…   Rupert stayed with Aaron in the car.  I felt strongly I would not take Aaron back to the spot where as a baby he was left alone, where no one he knew came when he cried.  I am the mother who will comfort him and always be there for him.  And so, our guide and I,  got out of the car.  We walked through the market – farmers selling beautiful produce and people selling other items.  I am so glad that we were able to locate this spot.  There were signs that they are starting construction to make this into a more modern shopping area and in fact construction equipment was at work along the river's edge.  A year from now, it will look very different…it is good we could find it today.   I did take a few photos, for Aaron to have when he is older.  I took photos of the market and of the homes.  It seemed to be a very poor area.  I knelt down and said a prayer.  I wish somehow, his birth family could know that the child they abandoned has now found a new family, a family who will love and cherish him for always.  I wish they could know that he is going to America and he will receive an education, medical care, a loving home and family, and everything he deserves.   And I know that as much as I am tempted to, I cannot pass judgment on what happened in those early months.  For it is part of my new son's story; it is part of how he has come to be my son.  And, I do know the reality is that it is highly likely it was NOT his birth mother who abandoned him; in many, many cases it is NOT the birth mother, but instead is the mother-in-law (the birth father's mother) who abandons the child (a girl, when the family wanted a boy; a child with a birth defect; a 2nd son in a country where the stiff penalties for having a 2nd child are steep - too much for most families in China; or a child who is sick, in a family unable to afford medical care).   The specific details of Aaron's finding are private information which we will share with Aaron when he is older.  (As we read the details in the report, we were filled with quite a few questions, which we will never have the answers to, and always wonder about.)    I do know that just as our orphanage visit, the images will be in my mind forever.  I don't mean they will haunt me.  Rather they will reinforce to me every day of my life that we are so lucky to have Aaron in our life.   When we returned to the car, our guide Dave had left the car, to use a restroom we assumed.  Wensi had bought some Bao'an bananas which we all enjoyed (very sweet!) and then we filled out paperwork for the American Consulate.  Rupert got out and walked along the marketplace.  Soon, Dave came back…with HIS SISTER…she teaches math for grades 8-12 at a secondary school just one kilometer from Aaron's finding spot.  He had called her, and she has lunchbreak from 12-2:20 (!, but teaches until 5:40) and the two of them had gotten us lunch.  So, we sat in the car (raining hard out) and enjoyed a picnic lunch.  Aaron devoured a chicken wing, and ate some congee.  This was so thoughtful of Dave, who Aaron now calls Big Brother in Chinese.  I cannot imagine many other families adopting from China have had picnic lunches right near their child's finding spot!   It was a wonderful day.  Tomorrow we must go back to the Medical Exam Center to have Aaron's TB test read (it looks fine).  Off to bed now! Love, Nicole